Chepstow woman’s Race for Life is tribute to husband

11:50am Friday 23rd March 2012 in News

TWO years after her husband died of stomach cancer, his wife Jo Rees, with her family and friends are backing the Race for Life in memory of him.

less than a month before being diagnosed with stomach cancer Barry Rees was playing five-a-side football regularly – but within four months of diagnosis, he was dead.

Jo, 38, still struggles to comprehend the speed with which the disease took her husband from her and their two children Luke, six, and four-year- old Amelia.

she admits to days when she feels like “climbing into a dark cupboard and not coming out”. but she is also confronting the hurt and despair head-on, by corralling friends into taking part in Cancer Research UK’s Race for Life, to raise money for research.

Mrs Rees, of Chepstow, said her engineer husband, was physically fit with a healthy lifestyle, and they did not even consider cancer as a possibility.

“He had some symptoms with indigestion the previous autumn, but it had been a stressful year for us both and we suspected a stomach ulcer,” she said.

“It wasn’t until Christmas that he started to get really ill. He became very weak, to the extent that he couldn’t even hold a screwdriver to assemble the children’s Christmas toys.”

mr Rees was admitted to the Royal Gwent Hospital on Boxing Day 2010, and the diagnosis came two weeks later. Stomach cancer can be particularly difficult to detect, and thus to treat, as symptoms often only manifest themselves once the disease is well-established.

“The cancerous cells were in the stomach lining, so there was no obvious tumour or growth. Barry understood the consequences, because he had researched stomach cancer as a possibility when he first became unwell,” said Mrs Rees.

“I was totally unprepared though, and just couldn’t take it in.

“The implications for me and our children, who were two and four years old at the time, were im-mense.”

After two full cycles of chemotherapy, mr Rees began then stopped a third, as the cancer was not responding, and the couple felt it was robbing him of his quality of life.

Mrs Rees recalls a “nightmarish”

time, wanting to be there for her husband and the children.

“I’d often stay up all night with Barry, then drive home to be there for the children in the morning. I don’t know how I got through it,” she said.

“My friends and family were great though, often just popping round with food because I didn’t have much time or energy for cooking.

“The hospital also helped, providing a bed so I could get some rest while with Barry.”

Mrs Rees also had the heartbreaking task of breaking the news to her children, and was helped to prepare for it by a support worker from St David’s Foundation Hospice Care.

“I wanted to be open and honest with them and explain the situation in terms they would understand,”

she said.

mr Rees died on April 7, 2010, aged just 37.

More News stories

A mother has told how she realised her young son had leukaemia after reading a book about a child with the condition and the same symptoms.

Joanne Morris suspected her son Alexander was sick when she noticed he was feeling exhausted and bruising easily on a family holiday aged just four in summer 2009.

She immediately took him to the GP because she remembered reading a book a decade before about a youngster who had bruised easily and had leukaemia.

And her worst fears were confirmed when he was referred to Rochdale Infirmary for tests and just hours later was given the devastating news he had some form of leukaemia.

He was due to join the reception class at Bury Grammar School with his twin sister Annabel that autumn but instead missed the first term because he spent so much time in hospital.

Alexander, now six, will continue to receive treatment until November 2012 but is back in the classroom and enjoying school.

He has coped so well that his headteacher Hilary Hutton has nominated him for a Cancer Research UK Little Star award, acknowledging the challenges faced by youngsters who encounter cancer.

She said: “The news that Alexander was not joining the class and was in hospital being treated for leukaemia came as a big shock to everyone.

“Alexander has been an inspiration to us all. he never complains or expects to be treated differently.”

Alexander’s mum Joanne, 39, and dad Christian, 39, praised their son’s bravery.

Joanne added: “I just knew that Alexander had leukaemia as I remembered reading a book about a child who bruised easily. So, even though the news was a huge blow to the family, it didn’t feel that much of a shock. Alexander was too ill initially to ask us any questions about what was wrong with him, but he now understands that he has ‘poorly blood’ and needs to go to hospital every two weeks.

“He absolutely loves all the staff at the hospital and actually enjoys going there as it’s been such a huge part of his life up to now.”

The awards, in partnership with TK Maxx, are open to all under 18s who have cancer or have undergone treatment in the last five years.

To nominate a child visit cancerresearchuk.org/littlestar .

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