I went to the British Museum to read up the treatment for some slight ailment of which I had a touch – hay fever, I fancy it was. I got down the book, and read all I came to read; and then, in an unthinking moment, I idly turned the leaves, and began to indolently study diseases, generally. I looked into the first one – and, reading the list of "premonitory symptoms," found out that I had fairly got it. I sat for awhile, frozen with horror; and then I again turned over the pages. I came to typhoid fever – read the symptoms – discovered that I had typhoid fever, must have had it for months without knowing it – wondered what else I had got; turned up St. Vitus's Dance – found, as
I expected, that I had that too, – began to get interested in my case, and determined to sift it to the bottom, and so started alphabetically – read up ague, and learnt that I was sickening for it, and that the acute stage would commence in about another fortnight. Bright's disease, I was relieved to find, I had only in a modified form, and, so far as that was concerned, I might live for years. Cholera I had, with severe complications; and diphtheria I seemed to have been born with. I plodded conscientiously through the twenty-six letters, and the only malady I could conclude I had not got was housemaid's knee. of course, a person with all these diseases can't live for long. I am not sure what I should do now – should I try the doctors? Should I write my will? or should I surrender myself to science and let the students learn their profession on me? What should I do?
uh… die!!!… i suppose… it is easier than living…
So you have typhoid fever, St Vitus's Dance, Bright's disease and cholera?
Bye bye, nice knowing you.
write your will, but also try doctors.
Go to a psychologist, because you have an awful case of hypochondria as well.